What would Buddha do?
An advice column from Siddhartha Gautama's perspective
Q: Dear Siddhartha,
I have found myself in a huge predicament. My friends and I went to the local shopping center yesterday, trying to find outfits and accessories for our upcoming school formal. We were inside a jewelry store and found a lovely pearl necklace on display. The necklace retailed for about $200, and we were all fawning over its beauty. My best friend, whom is normally a "straight-edge" type of girl, slipped the necklace into her purse and nonchalently walked out of the store without a single theft detector going off. Myself and the remainder of my friends walked out with her, and stood outside of the store shocked at her illegal and dangerous actions. We all tried to persuade her to return the necklace, and reminded her that she could go to jail if she were to get caught with necklace. She rolled her eyes at us, and scoffed, "I made it out of the store didn't I? The necklace is mine now." So what should I do? I know what my friend did is illegal and wrong, but if I turn her in it will surly ruin our friendship. What would Buddha do? -Conflicted Friend |
A: Dear Conflicted Friend,
What your friend did at the jewelry store was wrong, and there is no excuse for stealing. The second step in the Eightfold Path consists of Right Intention. This demonstrates a commitment to ethical and mental self-improvement. What you need to do as a follower of the Eightfold Path, is either talk your friend into returning the necklace directly to the store manager, or turn her into the authorities. Buddha distinquishes three types of Right Intention: 1) the resistance to the pull of desire, 2) the intention of good will, and 3) the intention of harmlessness. Your friend obviously contradicted the first type of Right Intention, by allowing her desire for the necklace to overpower her conscious. You need to act upon the second type of Right Intention, and allow good will to surpass the worry over losing your friendship. Also, the fourth step of the Eightfold Path, Right Action, applies directly to your situation. It states that unwholesome actions lead to an unsound state of mind. If you let your friend get away with stealing the necklace, your conscious would never allow your mind to rest. The only way to allow peace to be present within your mind is to exhibit Right Action and make her return the necklace. This is not an easy task, but eventually your friend will come to her senses and thank you for directing her toward the right path of truthfulness. If she does not, then maybe she's not as good of a friend as you thought. Good luck, and may peace be with you. -Siddhartha Gautama |